Wacky Boat Races sail into Lakeview Harbor
After a conducting the Wacky Boat Races at the Sandy Beach Bridge in Russells Point for a number of summer seasons, the races were moved last year to Lakeview Harbor following a Covid-inspired several-year intermission.
About 300 spectators were on hand Saturday, Aug. 9, to cheer on boats that were built specially for the occasion, mostly out of materials that may be found sitting around the backyard or garage.
Wacky Boat Races are just that, homemade and handmade boats that must be built from the ground up, if you will pardon the pun, and decorated in any manner – the wackier the better – that pleased the shipwrights.
The boats are required to be human-powered (no trolling motors allowed!) and had to be able to head from the dock to about 25 yards out into the harbor, before doing a 180 and bringing the boat back into port ahead of their competitors in the double-elimination bracket.
The Lakeview Business Group and the Lakeview Amvets Post 39 were instrumental in putting together the Wacky Boat Races with Brenda Moots, who represented the LBG, acting as emcee.
“The Amvets does an amazing job with all of their volunteers coming out to help,” Moots said. “It’s just fun to get people over here and see our harbor and see what we have to offer in Lakeview with our shops and restaurants.”
Saturday’s races brought forth such entries such as the Sougy Dog, a two-man affair equipped with a complete table setting, including condiments, drinks, a cooler, and a charcoal grill; the multicolored delight of the Fearless Fitness Pier Pressure, powered by two ladies who used modified crutches as paddles; as well as the Bone Barge, which was held together with about 50 rolls of duct tape, while sporting the Jolly Roger flag and a figurehead of a skeleton on the bow.
The Bone Barge, a one-man operation, lost in the semi-finals by a nose, or rather a lack thereof, skeletons generally not coming equipped with an olfactory organ. This close call was made all the more more impressive by the fact that the Bone Barge made use of straw brooms as oars.
In the end, the final race featured a rematch from last year between the brothers Mertz, with Vincent, the elder of the two who piloted the ONU Football Boat, taking home the first-place trophy, as he did last year, and Oden, who paddled the Holders Redemption boat, coming in a close second in the final race, again as he did last year.
Not that losing to his brother for the second year running fazed Oden.
“I’m gonna win next year,” he said, flatly.
Alas, not all of the Wacky Boats proved to be seaworthy (all competitors were required to wear proper floatation devices and both the Indian Joint Fire District Dive Team and Lakeview Fire and Rescue pontoons were on hand for the event), with two of the boats failing to make it out of dry dock, as one pulled a Titanic as it was set in the water and flipped over prior to the start.
Another boat, the Pricillia, proved to have more floating ability and was able to compete Saturday, but on its maiden voyage, it listed to starboard to the point where making the 25-yard leg out into the harbor made it almost impossible to turn the tub around and make the 25-yard sprint back to the dock.
Once the Pricillia got the correct heading to port, it brought with it several of the multi-colored buoys that marked the race lanes. Adjustments were made and the Pricillia fared better in the knockout round leaving the buoys where they were, but again came out in on the back end of the race.
Plans are already being made to host the races again next summer, but Moots gave a piece of advice to those who have the hankering to build a boat out of beer kegs and patio furniture and test their ingenuity and luck by competing for the big trophy and bragging rights in 2026.
“If you sink at the dock, you can’t race,” she said with a laugh.
